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Prologue - 1: Lab-16
- 2: Recon - 3:
PBJ-Magic - 4: Noah's Arc
5: Math Wheels
- 6: Gapwar - 7: Rack'Em
- 8: FitTris
The Big Help - Chapter 08 - Physical FitTris
I was working undercover as a waiter at "Micheli's - B 'n B", a little
Italian Restaurant located in "The City by the Bay". The owner was a little
Italian too. It wasn't a bed and breakfast. The "B 'n B" stood
for Mark's (the owner) other two passions. He loved cooking and eating pasta almost as much as he loved his Bridge and Basketball.
The floor of the restaurant was made of Parquet tiles from the late great Boston Garden. In the far left corner of the restaurant was a
regulation hoop and enough room for an interesting game of one on one. Each table was square and could only seat four people. A deck of cards
was between the salt and pepper shakers of each table just in case anyone wanted an impromptu game of Bridge (or even it's lesser known
cousins - Spades or Hearts).
Mark was so competitive that if you beat him one-on-one then dinner was on the house. I worked undercover there for three weeks and I
only saw him lose once to a guy who was a few years older and about sixty pounds overweight but with a killer three-point shot. I think
he went by the name "Kid Kazz". The whole time he was beating Mark, he was taunting him with a very strange expression. He kept saying
over and over again: "It's all about Physical FitTris Baby!!!".
It was a great game and it was great to see Mark finally lose one, but that's another story. What I'm really here to tell you about
is the strange customers who came in on my last day undercover.
Three Little Pigs walked into Micheli's for dinner. I approached and asked them what they wanted to drink before they ordered. The first
little pig said "I'll have a Sprite". The second little pig said "Coke please". The third little pig said "I'll just have a glass of water".
"Before I go away, can I get you any appetizers?" I asked. The first little pig said "I'll have some Onion Rings". The second little
pig said "I'll have some Mozzarella Sticks." and the third little pig
looked up and said...."Ah....just bring me another glass of water".
I returned with the drinks and appetizers and then asked the three little pigs what they would like for dinner. The first
little pig chose Steak, the second little pig chose Chicken and the third little
pig said "Just bring me another glass of water please".
At the end of dinner I went over to take their dessert order. The first little pig chose Apple Pie, the second little pig chose Chocolate Cake and the third little pig said: "Just one last glass of water thank you".
When I brought the bill to the Three Little Pigs I turned to the third little pig and said: "I have to ask you something. Your friends all had normal dinners, but all you had was glass after glass of water. What's up with that?". Well, the third little pig looked up and remarked "I'm the designated Pig". "What do you mean by that?" I asked, "It's not like your friends were drinking alcohol or that they'd even be driving home".
"Oh, of course not" said the third little pig, "It's not that, it's just that one of us has to go wee, wee, wee....all the way home".
(Based on a Joke first told to me by my Niece: Brittany Welcome - thanks)
(When I first wrote the part about Micheli's Italian
restaurant, I had put two Ls in both Micheli and in Italian. When he read
this and told me to spell his name right, I also noticed the incorrectly spelled
Italian as well. I told him "How can I be expected to spell Micheli
correctly if I can't even spell Italian correctly?". In hindsight,
I'd been playing Basketball with him for many years and this is the first time
he's called me for Double Drib-L-ing.)
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